Helping Kaitlyn

I have been discussing ADD, ADHD and Kaitlyn with Doctors and Counselors. She is going in tomorrow for a all day test at Access Point. They will test her mental abilities. I am so confused by her. She does not act up around anyone but us at home. She clams up around other adults and doesn't respond to them. She takes hours to do one page of homework. She is so Loud and out of control at home. Some days I say "I am done" I just don't want to put up with this anymore. I don't think she knows what rules are, she doesn't care about consequences. I know there is something wrong but others don't see it. I have gotten a lot of negative feedback about putting her through the testing. But no one sees her like Mike and I do. She is out of control! I am not doing this to medicate her. I am doing this to be able to deal with life happily and she doesn't want to kill herself in a couple years. She needs help at school and no one can see it. She is still soiling her pants multiple times a day. She is Very emotional up and down all day. I wish I could video tape her all day one day and show it to those who don't understand me. I am hoping that we as parents and Kaitlyn can go to some counseling after this and find out how to deal with things the correct way. So we can be happy at home again and not constantly stressed out.

We started a marble jar the other day. It is to help us be more loving in our family. When the kids get their homework done before Mike gets home from school with out issues they get a marble. Some thing with their chores. They also get one if they go all day without a fight. They get one for every extra chore they do. When they each get 50 marbles they get to pick a date with mom or dad. They get to do what ever they want. They are really excited about this. David has been sick for a couple days and he is still working hard to pick up after Logan and get extra marbles. They have not fought since Monday when we started the jars and the weekend was horrible! I hope it works! Even though Kaitlyn came home today and said she doesn't care if she doesn't get a marble she doesn't want to do her homework or chores. What do I do! She doesn't get it!